When you are in love and your love leave for unknown reasons and you can’t stop thinking about him. Here we are going to tell you that why you cant stop thinking and how to stop thinking.
Attraction can take very different forms. We may be drawn to a specific person physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, or all of these. And often the inability to understand what exactly attracts us to a person makes us think about him over and over again.
Do you like him because he looks attractive? Or is he smart and charismatic? You need to answer these and other questions to understand why you can’t get it out of your head.
In addition, we are most often attracted by those who do not immediately reciprocate with us and whose conquest we need to make efforts. And if another person likes you, or the object of your attention behaves confidently and radiates happiness, it strengthens our feelings.
If you like the person you are thinking of, then this most likely means that you are interested in him. When we fall in love, a series of chemical changes take place in our brain. Because of these changes, you constantly think about the object of your desires, get nervous and worried in their presence.
Even if you are not reciprocated, thoughts about the person are already difficult to stop.
This Person is a Mystery to You
If you think about the person is a mystery to you all the time, chances are, he is an absolute mystery to you. In this case, you are not necessarily attracted by the person himself, but by the very desire to figure out what he is.
Some people are by nature more reserved and mysterious, and if you are curious enough, you can literally go crazy thinking about this person.
The more you communicate, the clearer this person will be to you, and the less obsessive thoughts will visit you.
It Hurts Ego
It might just be that the person hurt your feelings or made you feel like you need to prove something.
For example, your colleague at work, who is always ahead of you, relegating you to the background. Or the guy who rejected you and now you want to prove to him that he means nothing to you.
This is called the ego trap. But it’s important to remember that the most important thing is to live life to the fullest, get better, and do what you love.
Forget what others think and ignore your ego’s desire to prove something to someone. When it says that you need to prove who you really are, do not listen to it and do what really matters. You will be much happier when you listen to your heart and not your ego.
Anger
It also happens that we think about a person not only because he offended us, but also because we are angry with him, but we have no way to tell him about it.
If you feel this urge, do it. Speak from the bottom of your heart, let the person know that they hurt you. If you accumulate anger in yourself, it can end in an explosion of emotions and cause even more aggression on their part.
If you don’t want to talk about it, let go. Realize that the person hurt you and what could be causing it and move on. When you forgive someone, you release the prisoner.
Distracting Maneuver
Is there a lot going on in your life? If so, then the thought of kissing someone else can be an easy way to distract yourself from all the problems and fuss that exist in your life.
Sometimes thinking about another person is just a trap. We think about him because we don’t want to think about ourselves or any aspect of our life.
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This Person Represents Your Ideal
Perhaps the person with whom you had a fleeting bond represents whatever you would like in your lover. Or maybe it was a person with whom you have already been in love for a while, but did not hope that he would come up to you. For example, he was higher than you in status or social status.
In all these cases, you put this person on a kind of pedestal, and the relationship did not have time to develop to such an extent that you knew all his shortcomings.
Most likely, this person represents something that you would like to have, such as money, success, or self-confidence, but it seems to you that you do not have it, and the chance was missed. You should think about it.
The Culmination Of a Painful Topic
Most often, obsessive thoughts about a person arise when you look back at a relationship and realize that they never had a continuation, or that the person was not free or cheated on you.
When this situation is repeated many times, it is a sign of a subconscious process.
Perhaps, subconsciously, you choose people who repeatedly deceive your expectations. Now it has become especially painful for you, because it happened to you before.
The Person Reminds You Of Someone From The Past
Let’s say you had a selfish father, or didn’t have one at all, or an alcoholic mother, or aggressive parents. Consciously, you would like to avoid these types of people so as not to relive negative emotions over and over again.
And suddenly you fall in love with just such a selfish, cruel, addicted person.
Even Sigmund Freud at one time argued that we are attracted by familiar experience, because we subconsciously want to cope with that situation.
We think that if we can get someone like our father to love us, then we can fix the situation.
However, this strategy is risky, because if something goes wrong, the pain that we have experienced from the very beginning comes to the surface along with new grievances. This is one of the reasons why we sometimes cannot forget some people.
You Subconsciously Experience Disappointment or Resentment
If you constantly check out your ex’s page to check what’s going on in his life, it’s a sign that something is outside of your conscious control. This is especially true if you have blocked or removed it from your friends.
Friends and loved ones may be tired of hearing about him, but you still want to talk about this person. You have used every means you can to forget about it, but any broken heart takes time to heal.
It’s important not to judge yourself harshly because disappointment is very difficult to deal with alone.
What If You Don’t Like A Person
In some cases, we cannot stop thinking about the person because we don’t like him. This is often a family member or boss with whom we communicate frequently.
Anything they don’t do reminds us over and over again of what makes us feel uncomfortable. The brain constantly scrolls through the details that bother us, which leads to a vicious circle of worry.
Such unpleasant thoughts can also be intrusive and cause feelings of hopelessness.
How To Stop Thinking About A Person?
He never leaves your thoughts. Maybe he’s your ex, someone you recently met, someone you didn’t know for long, but who influenced you a lot, and you keep thinking about what could have been. Whatever the reason, the essence is the same – you can’t stop thinking about a person. But thoughts about what happened or what could have been, only make you live in the past or guesses, preventing you from living in the present.
You want to stop thinking about him, but the more you try, the less you get it. Therefore, here are some proven techniques to finally get it out of your head.
Stop Thinking About Him
Trying to purposefully stop thinking about him, you think about him even more. It’s like someone trying to stop thinking about eating a chocolate cake, and that’s why they want it even more. It’s something in human nature that instinctively makes us want what we don’t have.
It’s the same with thoughts. The more we try to prevent them, the less we succeed. Therefore, the best thing you can do is to switch your attention to something else – to think about yourself, about your future, and your thoughts will take on some new ideas.
Don’t Follow Him Online
Stop flipping through his page, trying to figure out where he is and with whom. This will only make your situation worse. Refrain from visiting his page. The less you know, the better for you.
Live Your Life
This is the best remedy for everything. Switch your attention from him to yourself. Imagine how much better and more productive to live your life will become if you spend all the time and energy that you spend thinking about him on yourself.
Exclude Him From Your Daily Conversations
If in every conversation with your best friend you constantly remember him, this is a problem. You are obsessed with him and make it difficult for yourself to finally stop thinking about him.
Create New Memories
Find a new hobby, come up with a new work project, sign up for courses or volunteer work – whatever, just to keep your hands and head busy.
Travel, meet new people, spend time with friends and family. Explore the world around you. Don’t sit and suffer. You are beyond that, and your life longs for new adventures.
Start Over
There is no better way to start again than when you finish something. So, don’t stay in the past for long. Think about the present. How can you make every moment of your life worthwhile? Think about what you want to do in the future.
You can be whatever you want, do whatever you want with your life. The only person who can stop you is yourself. So, if you master your thoughts, you can do anything.
Stay Away From Negative People
Those who constantly ask you about what you want to forget: “Poor thing, how could he do this to you?” They don’t help, they only prolong your pain. Especially when they say: “You probably did something wrong.” There are simply such people, it is in their essence. so, you just need to stop communicating with them, at least until your life gets better.
Understand That He is Far From Perfect
When we miss someone or think about how things could have turned out differently, we tend to idealize the person and what we had with him. But you need to take a step back and look at the reality of the situation. If you’ve broken up, there is usually more negative than positive. And if you only recently met him, then you just don’t know him well yet.
Stop Looking For An Explanation
We always want to get to the bottom of things. We think that if we know the real reason why something ended, why something didn’t work out, why people don’t stay together, why he treated us badly, as if then we would not suffer so much. But the questions are endless, and no one can answer them.
Therefore, we begin to look for answers in our head, replaying past scenarios and trying to see at what point everything went wrong.
But sometimes it’s better not to know the answer at all. Sometimes it doesn’t calm the soul. So, there is nothing to think about at all.
I’m Sorry
This applies to everything in life. When you hold a grudge, when you remember the person responsible for your pain, you let that negativity dominate you.
Thinking about him makes you sad, angry, and you cannot stop thinking about him, because you cannot forgive him. Let go, Let karma figure it out.
Do Not Contact Him For At Least One Month, But Preferably Three
The less you see or hear him, the faster you will stop thinking about him. The clearer you will be able to look at him from the outside and understand that he is not worth your time and place in your head and heart.